Envy is a condition that distorts sight and perception.

Its wretched lens simultaneously magnifies the splendour in others and the despondency within yourself.

The daffodil suddenly appears malicious, flaunting its own beauty and mocking your lack thereof. The same flower that symbolizes respect and self-esteem in Japanese culture reminds you that it also embodies the unfortunate Greek myth of the vain Narcissus who falls in love with his own reflection.

It’s as if the world conspires against you and you retreat into yourself. Bitterness well up and intensify so much so that it becomes another you, a manifestation of your envious spirit feeding upon the hate you secretly harbour.

This is an Ikiryō.

It reveals your ugliness and you hate yourself all the more because of it. You and your Ikiryō covet the daffodil, not just because of its beauty but, more importantly, what it stands for: respect and self-esteem. Deep in you heart, you know long for them.

Perhaps, to earn these means tearing your eyes away from the object of yearning, turning around and embracing your Ikiryō instead. After all, the first step to healing is learning how to forgive yourself.